All Fun and Games: A Team Charge Compilation

Written on 3/11/2023

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Summary:

Team Charge’s more fatal FLARP campaigns, up until their very last one..

Usually, you’d try to keep the fatality in your FLARP sessions to a minimum, but some things are out of your control.

Like your player’s luck, for example. Observe.

oK, uHH, yOU ROLLED,,
oNE,
wOW, tHAT IS, iNCREDIBLY ROUGH,
sORRY,
>(wait what *_)
>(this wasnt meant to happen! x_)

-- intelligentFighter's [IF'S] computer exploded. --

As a bright light overtakes your vision, your holographic view disappears before you.

Uh oh.

You open and refresh the FLARP program on your husktop. To it, no player is connected, and a stat bat was not deployed. But you know better.

As in, your player’s flapstractions are definitely dead, and seeing how close they were to each other before the explosion, said player most likely is, too. Whoops..

It’s sort of sad. You had such a fun campaign planned.. Maybe next time.

You should also check in on your teammate. Right now. Make sure that she’s not dead and all...

-- adiosToreador [AT] began trolling apocalypseArisen [AA] --

hEY, uHHH,
tavr0s
h0w is y0ur first time cl0uding g0ing
nOT, vERY GOOD, i THINK,
bECAUSE, uM, i’M PRETTY SURE MY PLAYER JUST DIED,
tHEY ROLLED A BAD, aND LITERAL ONE,
tHEIR COMPUTER EXPLODED, aND FROM THEIR PROXIMITY, mAYBE THEM TOO,
mY PROGRAM ISN’T WORKING ANYMORE EITHER,
}:(
0_0
that happens quite a l0t
especially in extreme games like these
but im s0rry that y0u had t0 see and start it
iT’S FINE, pROBABLY,
i’LL GET USED TO IT, bUT i DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO NEXT,
just inf0rm my clouder and wait f0r me t0 finish
im sure hell understand
oK, tHANKS,
aLSO, uH, hOW’S YOUR CAMPAIGN, dO YOU NEED ANY MORE HELP,
s0 far very very fun and n0
even th0ugh i just r0lled a tw0 0n a b0ss battle!
iSN’T THAT BAD,
it is
oH NOOO,
s0 i have t0 g0 n0w
bye tavr0s!
bYE, aRADIA, dON’T DIE ON ME, }:)
ill try but n0 pr0mises 0u0

-- apocalypseArisen [AA] ceased trolling adiosToreador [AT] --

She’s a really experienced player. You know she won’t actually die. That’s why it’s so fun to joke about it.

What’s not a joke, however.. is the fact that you’re going to have to inform Aradia’s clouder about this. It, apparently, was hard for him to find a "willing" and "competent enough" teammate.

He’s going to be very mad.

Standing before your grey ranch, repurposed into a temple for your campaign and fauna politely moved away, you look back on the flapstraction puzzle presented to you.

Your current task is to find the auditory password for the door, which are based on riddles and puzzles presented to you before. All in order to free your teammate from your clouder’s grasp, while she holds said clouder hostage from his player from far away, as well.

It’s a prewritten, one-shot campaign you’ve played with Aradia before, and even keeps many puzzles the same. But the stakes are set higher this time. The timer’s set lower, your teammate is restricted to yes and no answers for hints, and each team races to get to their teammate first.

The consequence is a clouder’s death.

..Thankfully, you’re almost done! Got to love cooperation and helpful NPCs. You take out your palmhusk, and start asking.

-- adiosToreador [AT] began trolling apocalypseArisen [AA] --

sO, uHH,
iS THIS, pASSWORD, rELATED TO WHAT THE npc BESIDE IT, jUST SAID A FEW SECONDS AGO, lIKE EVERY OTHER PUZZLE SO FAR,
n0
they changed that t00
aAWW,
take y0ur time tavr0s
we have 5 minutes left and the 0thers are t00 busy arguing t0 n0tice that we are alm0st d0ne
its really fun t0 watch
yOU CAN SEE THEM,
n0 but my player keeps telling me ab0ut it
oH MAAAN, sORRY ABOUT THAT, cA CAN BE, wELL, aNNOYING, sOMETIMES,
mOST OF THE TIME, aCTUALLY,, i DON’T LIKE TALKING TO HIM,
its n0thing
he kn0ws that this dumb revenge plan 0f his isnt even g0ing t0 w0rk 0ut
its n0t 0ur fault that his teammate sucked
hAHA, yES, }:)

Admittedly, you’d do it all over again. But not right now. You’ve got a friend to save!

You observe your surroundings, the desolate grey ranch and its flapstraction lock, the bosses you took.. a really long while to kill, your lusii and fiduspawn friends roaming freely, and back to the NPC standing guard.

Who strangely looks like a bat…

iS THE PASSWORD RELATED TO MY STAT BAT,
yes!
yAY, uHH,,,
wOW, mY STATS SUCK,
they will get better 0ver time
thats h0w the game w0rks
uM, iS THERE, aNY RIDDLE RELATED TO WHICH SPECIFC, sTATS,
yes but i cant tell y0u which 0nes
oKAY, tHAT’S ALL FOR NOW, tHANK YOU, aRADIA,
y0ure welc0me!

-- adiosToreador [AT] ceased trolling apocalypseArisen [AA] --

You think about past riddles and lore tidbits you acquired from talking..

“What is a program that you can’t physically go to?”

..Oh! Well. Obviously.

tHE PASSWORD IS, “aPP”,
(shORT for apPlication, Or apPetite,,)

The door unlocks as the blue flapstraction disappears. That was relatively easy.

You push the door open, walking into the darkness. Blocky and glowing confetti releases from the ceiling, lighting up your teammate, whom is placing her Crosbytop down as she vigilantly unties herself.

Campaign over! The day is saved by Team Charge! You clap your hands in celebration.

g00d j0b tavr0s! we did it!
tEAM WORK, dOES MAKE THE DREAM WORK! }:)
yes exactly
n0w lets g0 get y0ur fauna in 0rder using it
i THINK ONE OF THEM GOT INTO MY HIVE,
that isnt g00d

The Dapper Damager proceeds to rejoice (and clean up) with the Boy-Skylark, as a certain Pompous Thaumaturge rages over a teammate’s death..

-- caligulasAquarium [CA] opened memo on board flarp shit. --

you fuckin pieces a shit
cant evver believve i thought this wwas a good idea
CA banned AT from responding to memo.
CA banned AA from responding to memo.

CA closed memo.

Uh. Ha. Haha.. Que sera, sera, you guess!!

Dashing through the stalks of bamboo, and whipping through every virtual cobweb you run into, you eventually find a spot desolate enough to be your new safe space. Whew!

This sure is a hard campaign your clouder made up for you. This first miniboss is far too difficult to kill!

But you can handle it.

-- adiosToreador [AT] began trolling apocalypseArisen [AA] --

i JUST CHECKED, yOUR hp,
pLEASE HANG IN THERE,
i’LL GET YOU HELP,
its really n0thing tavr0s!
uH, nO IT ISN’T,
aS YOUR, vERY CONCERNED, TEAMMATE, i HAVE THE RIGHT TO DO THIS,
hERE,
bUNDLE, fOR aA,
d0esnt this c0unt as cheating
whered you even get it fr0m!
mY PLAYER, sHE DOESN’T CARE,
aND, nEITHER DO i,
pLEASE JUST USE IT, }:(

Teammate’s orders, you guess! You open the file, and a healing bundle is helpfully scanned and spawned by your stat bat. You bandage and disinfect yourself, seeing that your life quite literally depends on it.

A holographic projection of your clouder appears before you, ancestor costume and all. Oh dear.

What do you think youre doing!
n0ne 0f y0ur business
get back to c0ntr0lling the b0ss 0r s0mething!
You're ch8ting?! Low 8low, Aradia!!!!!!!!

You immediately start running, ignoring Vriska's texts as she tries to holographically keep up. Swiftly taking out a grenade from your stolen bundle, you throw it behind you, and into the miniboss’s direction. And more, and more, and more, until you finally hear that familiar EXP ding.

Nice!

i just beat the minib0ss
0ne 0f the hardest battles i have g0tten s0 far
yESS, aMAZING JOB, aRADIA,
tHAT, wAS A CLOSE ONE,
s0rry f0r w0rrying y0u
iT’S, iT’S OK, aT LEAST YOU’RE OK,
th0se grenades really saved me back there
but n0w i have t0 get back t0 the game
and y0u t00
rIGHT, cAN’T HAVE MY PLAYER, bE RUNNING AROUND LOOSE,,
bUT, uM, pLEASE DON’T DIE, sERIOUSLY, tHIS TIME,
i w0nt

-- apocalypseArisen [AA] ceased trolling adiosToreador [AT] --

Twirling your FLARP costume’s mustache anxiously, you continue trucking on.

It’s been a while since you’ve clouded. It’s been a while since you’ve played FLARP at all! Yet you still have the all of the fun. Terezi’s really nice to cloud!

..Up until now. She doesn’t seem to be rolling at all. Just standing there, glaring to her right. Hehe, it’s kind of menacing!

terezi what are y0u d0ing
standing there
menacingly! 0_0
1 S4W SOM3TH1NG
W41T
SOM30N3 4CTU4LLY!! >8[
0h
let me see

Setting up your holograph, you see Terezi looking at you as she points at a nearby cluster of bushes.

Of which hosts a man with a white orb for a head.

Hm!

Terezi seemingly talks to him, but you can’t hear anything!

whats g0ing 0n
hell0
An event that will ensure my existence.
You two are contributing to it right now.
Thank you, sincerely.
UGH
0_0
thats a b0ld accusati0n
i d0nt even kn0w what is happening
Good.
terezi?
YOUV3 GON3 TOO F4R TH1S T1ME
DONT G3T H3R 1NVOLV3D 1N TH1S
4ND G3T OFF MY PROP3RTY!!
It is far too late now.
The deed’s already done, ladies.
huh
Try checking your notifications next time.
3XCUS3 M3?

You and Terezi exchange confused glances, before allowing her to take the lead and you to follow suit in checking your notifications only to see..

Oh.

Oh no.

-- adiosToreador [AT] began trolling apocalypseArisen [AA] --

aRADIA,
hEY,
aRE YOU THERE,
uHHH,
hMM,

-- adiosToreador [AT] ceased trolling apocalypseArisen [AA] --

-- apocalypseArisen [AA] began trolling adiosToreador [AT] --

tavr0s
im here
tavr0s whats happening are y0u 0k
uM, hAPPENED, aCTUALLY,
aND NOT REALLY, oK, i MEAN,
vRISKA JUST MADE ME JUMP OFF A CLIFF,
what
i CAN’T, fEEL MY LEGS,
i’LL, tELL YOU ABOUT IT, wHEN YOU GET HERE,
i’M FEELING INCREDIBLY SLEEPY, aLL OF A SUDDEN,
n0 n0 wait
stay awake

-- adiosToreador [AT] became idle. --

tavr0s
hang in there
im c0ming

You don't know what exactly happened, yet you know one thing:

Someone is going to pay.